500 things they never tell you about being a Mom

After the huge response to my blog post yesterday, I am inspired to continue writing about my observations as a Mother. So back by popular demand....here goes.

#21 It is a fun game to slowly walk down the aisle of the airplane with your toddler and watch the faces of horror as they plead with God that you choose a different seat.

#22 Some people will judge you for breastfeeding and the rest will judge you for formula feeding.

#23 You can slave over the stove for hours to prepare a meal and your kid will beg you for peanut butter and jelly sandwiches instead.

#24 You brag about your kid. It annoys people. You don't care.

#25 Kids don't care if you are sick, have cramps, or a New Year's Day hangover.

#26 Your kids embarrass you now...you will embarrass them later. It is a trade off.

#27 Buying batteries will deplete your savings.

#28 Your kids will want to see the inside of every bathroom at every restaurant, store, airplane, and church.

#29 You will consider using duct tape and paper towels when you run out of diapers. It is easier than going to the store.

#30 You believe your kid is brilliant, everyone else believes your kid is annoying and "too big for his britches."

#31 If you try to keep your kids from eating food off the floor, you will not only lose, you will lose your mind in the process.

#32 Kids get sick A LOT! Less if you breastfeed, but they will still get sick.

#33 Kids eat boogers and they could care less who sees them do it.

#34 Your kids think you know everything now and nothing later.

#35 Babies don't always smell that great.

#36 Hand-me-downs are vital in the financial survival of your family.

#37 It is fun to watch a baby eat a lemon wedge.

#38 Servers hate you! They cringe to see you seated in their section. They may consider plotting your death if you are the cool parent who orders your kid a virgin strawberry pina colada. Don't believe me? Order one and watch them try to not roll their eyes.

#39 You don't need to buy Dreft to wash your babies clothes. Hell, I sometimes forget to even use the cheap laundry soap I bought on double coupon day.

#40 All that cute crap you thought you really needed to register for your baby shower will rarely get used. REGISTER FOR DIAPERS!